It is a fact of human nature that sexual attraction between a man and a woman is a temporary phenomenon! As a rule, the “Romeo and Juliette” phase of any sexual relationship wears off within less than a year. In other words, no matter how fervent the physical relationship between a man and woman was when it began, within the first year, neither member of the pair looks forward to sex with his or her partner with anything like the excitement he or she experienced during the initial phase of their relationship!!!!! (This holds true for same-sex relationships as well.) This is not something that is widely understood by the public at large, but it is probably one of the most important facts of life that faces all the members of every society on earth.
This fact alone probably accounts for the wide incidence of infidelity and marriage dissolution throughout western civilization today. A good and responsible man married to a beautiful and stable young woman is caught by his wife in bed with some other apparently less desirable woman. A young attractive female school teacher in a loving and stable marriage with a kind and productive husband destroys her life and marriage when she is exposed having sexual relations with an adolescent male student. These are only the tip of the iceberg. Millions of divorces happen every year for similar though less publicized reasons.
There’s really nothing unusual or evil about either of the parties in these marriages. It’s human nature. EVERYONE is prone to these impulses. It’s natural to have these urges. It’s a fact of life!
This is the reason that every major religion (the ones that formed the moral foundations of every successful civilization) has so many stringent rules that mandate the maintenance of monogamous marriages. Sex is not simply an enjoyable pastime. It is a vital social function. Without becoming immersed in arguments about same-sex marriages, monogamous relationships between men and women have historically been the foundation of all successful civilizations because they are more likely to produce and to properly raise socialized children. In every society in history, social trends leading to the breakdown of normal sexual relationships between men and women has led to poverty and demographic decline. Ultimately, it leads to the decline of the entire civilization. I won’t belabor the point, but successful nations have always structured their laws to encourage stable permanent relationships between men and women. These laws spring from common law based on ancient religious doctrine.
This calls for one more point which is difficult to address. Marriages based exclusively on sex are always doomed to failure, but this is not to say that sex is unimportant in a marriage. It is vital! A marriage has to be based on a “sexual friendship” between two people.
That means that each member of the relationship has to WORK to satisfy his or her partner’s sexual desires even when the fires between the two have burned to a slow smolder. The maintenance of a monogamous marriage into old age requires that both parties see each other as essential friends and use whatever means necessary to keep their sexual behaviors within their own relationship. This may mean the use of Viagra or other ED drugs, sexual lubricants, sex toys, manual stimulation and even penile implants. And, of course, there’s always the use of plain old imagination during the encounter. Enduring and monogamous relationships between men and women are an essential part of every successful civilization and sex is an essential element of monogamous relationships!
Sex in a marriage means more than simple sexual release. Regular sex always brings the couple closer together. A real friendship between a man and a woman can be one of the most rewarding things about getting old. Each individual may have their own interests and hobbies, but those hobbies and interests derive their real meaning from the love they have for one another.